Love

Someday We'll Linger in the Sun - Gaelynn Lea

Everybody Needs a Sparkly Patrick

I received a package from my Facebook pal Patrick that I have to tell you about.

I met Patrick several years ago online. We were writing for the same website and became Facebook friends. Although I know very little about the guy – I probably knew more but my memory sucks – he’s one of my most colorful and compelling contacts in the Land of Lord Zuckerberg. His posts about politics, current events, entertainment and sex are witty, thought-provoking and fun. He’s an Occupy Wall Street/Don’t Taze Me Bro kind of guy, someone who reads Hunter Thompson, Charles Bukowski, Saul Alinsky and Malcolm X and also digs Dolly Parton, the Bee Gees and watching Leave It to Beaver while stoned. He marches for what he believes in and is pro-cannabis, anti-war and ready for the revolution.

Patrick with Dr. Cornel West

I know he’s from Jersey and lives in the Big Apple. I think he makes his living as a writer but I’m not sure. He could be a waiter or a dog walker or an Instagram influencer or an acupuncturist or all of the above. (Yes, he’s that smart.) I don’t know if he’s 25 or 35 but judging from his Facebook posts and my package, he’s youthful and energetic. He’s also unique and creative and confident, at least online. He’s very theatric and not the least bit afraid of cameras; I think of him as Sparkly Patrick, the campy dude with the boa and sunglasses at night. He’s opinionated too and I almost unfriended him once during a political disagreement but fortunately I came to my senses. What a mistake that would have been.

So anyway, a few weeks ago Patrick posted something in Facebook about how we need brightness in this grim world “so send me your address and I’ll try to brighten your day” or something along those lines – my memory sucks, remember? – so I sent him a DM and we exchanged addresses. Sure enough, a colorful yellow box, bigger than a shoebox but smaller than a microwave oven, adorned with SpongeBob and pig stickers, arrived at my doorstep from New York City a few days ago. It was a gift on so many levels.

The box included:

• Utensil packets from a fast food place
• Hot Wheels Fun Park
• A Pizzaboyzzz lapel pin
• A birthday candle in the shape of the number 6
• Assorted small plastic containers, one full of candies and Tums
• Stickers
• A LOVE refrigerator magnet
• A New York Metro card
• Fluffy ears headband
• Assorted loose playing cards
• Three condoms
• A photo of the Empire State Building
• Loose sheets of paper
• Two packets of Yogi organic tea
• Hand sanitizer
• Knitting for Dummies book
• More stickers
• “I’m With the Band: Confessions of a Groupie” book by Pamela Des Barres
• A small, battery-powered plastic candle flame
• A short personal note from Patrick

How crazy and cool is this? Look at the items individually and then collectively. How wonderful that someone would do this for me? Sparkly Patrick put playful thought into selecting and gathering each item, boxed them up, and spent time and money to mail them to me here in Michigan just to make me smile. How lucky am I to know someone as silly, sensitive and special as this guy?

It’s no secret that I’ve been depressed lately. In addition to the whole “people are refusing to wear masks during a global pandemic and increasing the likelihood that I’m gonna catch the virus” thing and my personal hell despair struggles challenges, there are racists murdering black men in the street. There’s the tragedy that is Trump and all this entails. There’s record unemployment and increased hunger, poverty and abuse. There’s devastating weather and climate calamities. And every day another scandal, crisis or accident, someone being mean to someone else, something bad happening that didn’t have to happen.

If you’re woke, it’s hard to be light-hearted, to smile and laugh and feel like everything might be okay after all. But that’s just what Sparkly Patrick’s package did for me. Hope it did it for you too.

What did the note say? None of your business. Get your own Sparkly Patrick. 😊