Nick and Rocco Are Together Again

I was scanning my Facebook news feed yesterday, looking for writing topics, when I ran across a story in the New York Post about Nick Santino and Rocco.

Mr. Santino was a struggling soap opera actor – “All My Children” and “Guiding Light” viewers might recognize him – who lived on New York’s Upper West Side with his beloved pit bull, Rocco. In 2010, his condo board issued harsh new rules regulating dogs in the building. Although Rocco was exempted from a new ban on pit bulls, friends and neighbors claim Mr. Santino started getting harassed by his neighbors. Rocco wasn’t allowed in the main elevator, he couldn’t be left alone in Mr. Santino’s apartment for longer than nine hours, and he was accused of barking too much.

So last Tuesday, after months of stress and aggravation, Mr. Santino had Rocco put to sleep. It was his 47th birthday.

But wait. There’s more.

Guilt-ridden and despondent over what he had done, Mr. Santino killed himself by overdosing on pills. He left a suicide note in which he wrote, “Today I betrayed my best friend and put down my best friend. Rocco trusted me and I failed him. He didn’t deserve this.”

Anyone who’s ever loved and relied on a dog can understand how Mr. Santino must have felt. Yes, there may have been other issues that contributed to his decision to end it all. But I can imagine how stressed and devastated he was by what his neighbors – and then he – had done to his canine companion, how overwhelmed he was by sadness and guilt.

The whole thing makes me cry.

This is not a post about my love for dogs. (I just did that. Click here.) And I’m not trying to defend pit bulls (although anyone who thinks all members of the breed are vicious and unlovable is misinformed, ignorant and unwelcome in my home). I’m writing about this because it’s a perfect example of what’s wrong with the world today.

People are assholes.

I’ve been around lots of dogs – and people – who were less than likable. I haven’t always been enamored with all of my neighbors. I’ve regretted living with or near certain people for what I thought were good reasons. I wasn’t always friendly, to be sure, but to my knowledge I never drove anybody to suicide.

Sometimes it’s possible, even necessary, to change the world so that it lines up with what’s right. (I’m thinking of people of color having access to the same drinking fountain that I use, for example.) But sometimes the task is to change ourselves – our own perceptions, expectations or interpretations – and accept the world as it is. Sometimes we all just need to live and let live.

Even if Rocco was known to bark loudly every night beginning at dinner time and ending at sunrise, is the best response to make life miserable for his owner? Couldn’t cordial meetings have been held instead? And let’s say people tried to be nice but Mr. Santino’s loyalty to Man’s Best Friend exceeded his commitment to neighborliness. Were his fellow residents then entitled to harass him and make him feel like his only option was to do away with his beloved companion and then himself?

We’re all floating through space on this watery orb together. And people are struggling, some obviously and some secretly. It seems like this could have ended better.


“No matter how deep my sleep, I shall hear you, and not all the power of death can keep me from wagging a grateful tail.” ~ Eugene O’Neill

Nick and Rocco photo courtesy New York Post.

Sources: New York Post, RadarOnline.com.